CHIANG MAI, THAILAND

Kyle, Chris, and I had signed up to take an all-day Thai cooking course today at the guesthouse/restaurant across the street. Unfortunately, last night I came down with a wicked stomach bug that had me puking my guts out for much of the night (and some of the morning, too). When I got up, I was still feeling pretty queasy, and believe me, the last thing I wanted to do was spend the day in a hot kitchen staring at green curry paste, fish sauce, and giant prawns.

So while they took the class, I stayed in bed and watched bad TV, including lots of American cartoons dubbed in Thai. I have to admit, they did a pretty good job with Scooby-Doo (they even did the theme song in Thai!), although Shaggy's voice didn't sound quite right.

CHIANG MAI, THAILAND

To heck with these temples, let's taste some danger! Today we took a whitewater rafting trip with Chiang Mai Adventure Co., who picked us up from our hotel and drove us two hours northwest of town, on highways and dirt roads, until we reached the Mae Tang River. There we were teamed up with a nice man from Lincolnshire, England and his two teenage daughters, given some basic rafting instructions, and thrown into a raft with a puny little Thai river guide named Dang ("That's Dang, not Dung!"), for a ten-kilometer ride downriver.

This rafting trip was a little more...er, exciting than normal because of all the rain we've had here over the past few days. The river, which normally consists of Class 2 to 4 rapids, was running high and fast, and some of the Class 4 rapids were up to Class 5 (the highest level you can raft commercially). Which of course made it all the more fun. There were safety teams stationed at the more tricky rapids, but no one even fell out of the boat (one of the girls lost a paddle, though). It was good fun, and certainly a change for me to be rafting through lush jungle greenery instead of the mountains of North Carolina!

After returning from our rafting trip, Chris, Kyle and I had dinner at Miguel's Mexican Restaurant (you'd be surprised how hard it is to find a good Mexican restaurant in Chiang Mai), then walked to the city's famous Night Bazaar, where hundreds of vendor stalls line the streets, selling everything from hill tribe handicrafts and T-shirts to throwing stars and crossbows. Unfortunately, it was often difficult to determine which items were native and authentic, and which were mass-produced in a factory somewhere in China. And after awhile, the amount of merchandise on display and crowds of people were a little overwhelming, so we didn't stay there all that long.

CHIANG MAI, THAILAND

Note the "M" above: Today Kyle, Chris and I took a bus westward from Chiang Rai to Chiang Mai, Thailand's second-largest city. Like Chiang Rai, it's a good base for trekking and such, but it's definitely more on the tourist trail, with lots of backpackers and other westerners about. It's also a little more interesting, as it contains over 300 temples, as well as the remains of the old city, founded in 1296, which forms a perfect square in the center of town. The moat surrounding the old city is still there, along with crumbling sections of the four walls that once ran along it.

After arriving in the afternoon, we caught a tuk-tuk from the bus station to our guest house, the Bow Chiang Mai, which is actually a rather cushy (for our standards) five-story hotel. After getting settled, we walked to nearby Wat Chiang Man, the oldest temple in the city (over 700 years old), which includes a large outdoor stupa with big plaster elephants around its base. The temple buildings themselves were closed for the day, but we could hear the monks chanting furiously inside, which was kind of cool.

CHIANG RAI, THAILAND

Who needs an alarm clock when you've got a village full of squealing pigs, yapping dogs, crowing roosters, and peep-peep-peeping chicks all directly underneath the floorboards of the hut you're sleeping in? Combine that with an abnormally large wolf spider that somehow got inside my mosquito net, and you can bet that I was well awake before my morning Nescafe'.

For our second day of trekking, we left through the back of the Lahu village and headed down the mountain past rice fields and deep into the jungle. For much of the way, we followed a rain-swollen stream, often wading through it, until we came to a waterfall, where we took some obligatory "here I am in front of a waterfall" pictures. Kai led us further into the jungle, and then out again into an area of farmland that had recently been replanted with native jungle vegetation. Along the way, we passed some Karen tribe women roasting ears of corn (they gave us some, which wasn't bad), and a hermit in a shack roasting a rat (we didn't ask for a sample). Finally we came to the village where we had left the truck yesterday. Kai then drove us to a nearby hot springs, where we ate lunch and soaked for a bit in the warm spring water (well, it was a swimming pool that they piped some spring water into) before heading back to Chiang Rai.

CHIANG RAI, THAILAND

Chris, Kyle and I have decided to do a two-day jungle trek which will take us into the hills and give us some more contact with some of the local hill tribes. We started out this morning with our guide, Kai, who's a friend of Tom's, and another guide-in-training named Pan.

Before doing any actual trekking, though, we were dropped off at a riverside boat dock in Chiang Rai, where we got into a longtail boat and traveled upriver through farmland for about an hour. We then arrived at an "elephant camp" populated by 35 Asian elephants and their mahouts (drivers). As I understand it, some of these elephants may have been used in logging operations years ago, but now they're just there for the tourists. I immediately bought a bag of pineapples and bananas to feed the big guys--it was quite amusing to see how excited they got at the prospect of fruit, sticking their long trunks out at us and shaking their heads from side to side in anticipation. (It was also pretty funny to see an elephant eat an entire pineapple in one bite.) We then got to ride the elephants around for about 40 minutes, first through the village (same traffic rules as for cars: elephants on the left side of the street), and then off-road, around some rice paddies and farms. Kind of touristy, but fun. Oh, and speaking of touristy: Before leaving the camp, Chris and I had our pictures taken holding a 100-pound python.

After a quick boat ride across the river to where our pickup truck was waiting, Kai drove us to a Karen tribe village where we began our trekking. Unfortunately, it's been pretty rainy for the past day or so, so this meant hiking in drizzling rain through thick red mud for most of the time. And we hadn't got more than twenty minutes into our trek when we came to a spot where the trail was completely washed out by a roaring river!

At this point we had to come up with an alternate route to today's destination, a Lahu hill tribe village several kilometers away. We ended up taking the "high road," a steep, muddy trail up the hillside which offered some nice views of the surrounding greenery but was a bit taxing on the calf muscles. And the mud on the road was so thick and sticky that Chris and Kyle had to regularly stop and scrape it off their shoes because it was making their feet really heavy. Luckily, I had invested 120 baht (about $3) in some wellies this morning, which seemed to handle the mud a little better than their sandals. On the trail, we came across two giant black beetles with scissor-like mandibles that Kai happily tore the limbs off and stuck in his pocket for eating later on. Mmm, big black beetles....

We made it to the hilltop Lahu village in the late afternoon, where we had a chance to rest on the porch of the raised bamboo house we'll be staying in tonight (along with the family that lives here!). About 70 Lahu tribespeople live in the village, along with a heckuva lot of noisy chickens, dogs, cats, and pigs. In some ways it seems to be a pretty traditional farming village, but there are a few modern touches--many of the villagers have motorbikes, and there are solar panels scattered around that provide limited electric power (for the TVs, of course!).

Kai, Pan, and Chris then cooked our dinner over the fire (which was inside the wooden hut!)--we had potato curry, stir-fried pork and vegetables, and soup, which were all excellent. We washed it all down with some of the local rice wine, very similar to the arak we had in Indonesia. One of the guys in the village then offered to do a "beer run" to the next village on his motorbike, so we gave him some money and he returned a little while later with six big Chang beers, which we shared with the villagers. They then rolled out mattresses and put up mosquito nets, and we all slept on the floor of the hut.

CHIANG RAI, THAILAND

Yesterday Chris, Kyle and I flew from Bangkok to Chiang Rai, the northernmost city in Thailand. It's a nice enough town, not much of a spectacular destination in itself, but it does make a convenient base for exploring the surrounding area, which includes the famous "Golden Triangle," the border between Thailand, Myanmar (Burma) and Laos.

On arrival, we were picked up by "Tom" (his farang name), who along with his wife runs the Mae Hong Son guesthouse where we're staying. They're some really nice folks, very friendly and personable. And as it happens, Tom also conducts sightseeing tours of the area, so today we piled into his little Mitsubishi compact and headed north for an all-day tour.

Our first stop was the Union of Hilltribe Villages, a sort of mini-EPCOT of northern Thailand's hill tribes (Akha, Hmong, Karen, Lisu, Lahu-muser, Palong, and Lu Mien-Yao). Actually, it's a little more authentic than EPCOT--these are actual villages with people living and working in them; they're just all conveniently located next to one another, which is great for lazy tourists who don't want to hike up into the hills for days! It was interesting to see each tribe's traditional dress and dwellings and to hear a little about their customs. In one of the villages we were treated to a music and dance performance, and in the others we saw women creating handicrafts, many featuring incredibly intricate weaving. Perhaps the most fascinating thing for me to see were the women of the Long-Necked Karen tribe, who wear dozens of brass rings that elongate their necks like giraffes.* It doesn't look very comfortable to me, but they were all smiling and laughing, so I guess it's fine for them.

After that whirlwind village tour, we made a stop at the Monkey Cave and Temple, a cliffside spot that's home to dozens of (what else) monkeys, and also features a stream with scores of huge koi and catfish. The monkeys were a different kind than I've seen before--they looked like macaques, but had red faces and shorter tails than the ones we saw in Bali and Malaysia. Of course, there were vendors there selling bananas, peanuts, and fish food pellets for the tourists to feed the critters, resulting in the usual amount of monkey madness and mayhem. I noticed that the staff also carried slingshots, in case the monkeys got a little out of hand. Luckily, today they were relatively well-behaved, and we were able to feed the monkeys and leave with all of our extremities intact.

Our next stop was Mae Sai, the northernmost point of Thailand, where we stopped at a nice overlook across the border into Myanmar (Burma). There's also a giant sculpture of a scorpion here, which although I forget its significance is pretty cool, regardless.

We then headed east to the famed Golden Triangle, and paid a visit to the "House of Opium," which sounds a lot more decadent than it really is! It's actually a museum about the opium trade, which for hundreds of years (until only about 50 years ago) gave this region worldwide infamy. As museums go, it was only so-so (apparently there's a much more flash opium museum down the road--with a much higher admission fee), but it was still interesting to see all the centuries of drug paraphernalia: Lots of elaborate pipes, scales, and intricately carved weights used in the trade.

After the museum, Tom led us down to the Mekong River, where we boarded a longtail boat that took us on a short tour of the Triangle--at one point, Thailand was the left bank of the river, there was a wedge of Myanmar in front of us, and Laos was on the right bank--pretty cool. We were actually able to stop for a bit on the Laos side, where there was a little "village" of vendor stalls selling Laotian souvenirs; the most popular being bottles of whiskey with poisonous snakes, scorpions, geckoes, and ginseng preserved in them. According to one of the vendors, drinking this brew "make you strong, like Viagra!" Chris actually tried a shot, but I prefer my whiskey straight, thanks.

The final stop on our tour of the far north was the town of Chiang Saen, which features crumbling ancient ruins in the midst of a modern Thai city. We saw a number of temples, pagodas, and Buddha statues at the temple complex of Wat Phra Dhat Pha Ngao, none of which I can tell you much about except that they are quite beautiful, and some are over 700 years old. Tom is a bit of an expert on the various styles of Buddhist temples, and gave a lot of details about their construction, but of course I immediately forgot it all. Anyway, we saw an awful lot today; my brain can't process every detail!


*Technically speaking, the rings don't stretch their necks at all; they just push down the shoulders and ribcage.

BANGKOK, THAILAND

Once again Chris and I have decided to join forces with another traveler, which always makes things more interesting and fun. Kyle Honda, who sounds a little like a car dealership, is actually a very cool guy from Hilo, Hawaii, who's here on a two-week vacation. He's never been to Thailand before, but he's interested in seeing the northern part of the country like we are, so now it looks like we'll heading there together in the next couple of days. Oh, and he's also half-Japanese, like me, which is kind of cool.

Yesterday the three of us headed downtown to meet up with a Thai guy named Surawit who Chris met on his return flight to Bangkok. He's a chef who works at the Wynn Hotel in Las Vegas, back in Thailand for a few weeks' vacation. Chris had talked to him on the plane about meeting up in Bangkok and going out to eat--I think the idea was that since he's a chef, he would take us to a really exceptional local restaurant. As it turns out, we met at the mall, and ate at a cheap Chinese restaurant near there, which was fine, if not exactly world-class.

Oh, and speaking of world-class dining, today I ate a bug.

Yep. I think I mentioned in a previous post that there's a vendor on Khao San Road who sells deep-fried crickets, grubs, water beetles, scorpions, etc. Well, after weeks of walking past his cart, I finally got up enough nerve to try one this evening. I chose a big crunchy grasshopper, which actually didn't taste too bad--the worst part were the back legs, which were like eating two sticks. I guess it just goes to prove that you can deep-fry anything and it tastes pretty good. (A scary thought, I know.)

And here's an amusing postscript: To get the taste of the grasshopper out of my mouth, I bought some chicken on a skewer from another street vendor, which is usually quite yummy. I had thought I was buying pieces of breast meat, but on closer inspection, I couldn't figure out what part of the chicken it was--they were little plump triangles, with a bit of backbone in the middle. I ate a couple, but they were a little too fatty for me, so I gave the rest to Chris. Anyway, later I described what I bought to a Thai guy, and asked him what part of the chicken it was. "Oh, that was chicken ass," he said. Great....

BANGKOK, THAILAND

Wouldn't you know it--just as I was starting to enjoy myself here in southern Thailand, I got word yesterday that Chris is on his way back to Bangkok! Of course, I'm very glad he's returning, although it's a little sooner than I had expected. Anyway, when I found out he was on his way, I went ahead and booked a flight to Bangkok today on Air Asia--only $46 from Phuket, which ain't bad, and sure beats a 15-hour overnight bus ride!

Before I had to leave Patong, though, I managed to squeeze in a few hours of beach time this morning. Patong Beach is really pretty nice--it's a long, crescent-shaped bay with decent sand and a wide esplanade, similar in size to Kuta Beach in Bali. I was actually admiring the smart-looking beachfront walkway with its nice tile mosaics, sculptures and landscaping when I realized why everything looked so nice--it was all brand-new, because the tsunami had swept away whatever was here before. Then I noticed the tsunami evacuation route signs posted on the beach, which were a little sobering, too--especially when I realized that I could never get to the "safe" zone in time if I did see a giant wave coming in! That aside, it was a lovely beach, and there were plenty of people swimming, sunbathing, boating, parasailing, and generally enjoying themselves there, so I tried not to think too much about giant waves and mayhem and such.

So anyway.... The flight this evening was relatively uneventful, and now I'm back in Bangkok. I met up with Chris at our old guesthouse on Khao San Road, which is just as much of a mess as I remembered, and we caught each other up on the events of the past three weeks.

KOH PHI PHI, THAILAND

My Lonely Planet guide suggests staying in Phuket town rather than at the island's beaches, pointing out the unique Sino-Portugese architecture which supposedly gives it charm and character. But after a day here, I have come to the conclusion that the book is nuts, this place is completely uninspiring, and I'd much rather be at the beach!

So today I decided to take a boat trip to Koh Phi Phi, one of the most famous and beautiful beach destinations in all of Thailand. Actually, Phi Phi consists of two islands, Phi Phi Don and Phi Phi Leh, both featuring iconic towering limestone cliffs, white-sand beaches, and crystal-clear waters. Phi Phi Don, the larger island, also supports various accomodations, restaurants, bars, and the usual beachside tourist traps, while Phi Phi Leh, which is mostly rock, is uninhabited and undeveloped, although it's even more visually striking.

I took a big charter boat of about a hundred people from Phuket harbor, which made it to the islands in about an hour and a half. After letting off a bunch of people at Phi Phi Don, we moored off nearby Monkey Beach (aptly named, as there are monkeys running around on the beach!) to do some snorkeling. As Phi Phi was one of the hardest-hit areas in the 2004 Boxing Day tsunami, I was curious to see what kind of damage the coral reef sustained.

Surprisingly, the reef here was in pretty good shape--I couldn't see any overt signs of tsunami damage. What really disturbed me, though, was the damage I did see being caused by stupid tourists touching, kicking, and standing on the coral, which of course kills it. Given the number of tour boats filled with snorkelers that anchor here every day, I'd really hate to see what this location will look like in five years.* That aside, I saw a larger variety of marine life here than in the Perhentians or in Koh Phangan--lots of wrasses, butterfly fish, clownfish, parrot fish, rabbit fish, groupers, and even schools of cool harlequin filefish, which I don't think I've seen since Fiji. I even saw a little deadly sea snake--yay!

After snorkeling, we piled back in the boat and did a quick circuit around Phi Phi Leh. Most of the island's shore consists of sheer rock cliffs, but there are a few "hidden" coves and beaches, and several large caves where locals harvest the nests of swiftlets (for bird's nest soup). The most famous spot on the island, though, is Maya Bay, a gorgeous stretch of sand almost completely enclosed by rocky cliffs that was used as the famous beach in The Beach (that accursed movie again!). Unfortunately we didn't get to stop there, but just did a quick "drive-by."

We then headed back to Phi Phi Don to have lunch at a local restaurant, where I made friends with a Turkish guy named Serkan who's traveling on his own, too. His English was only a little better than my Turkish, but I managed to understand most of what he was saying. After lunch, we decided to hang out at nearby Loh Dalam Beach (another really nice beach) for an hour or so, until we had to board the boat again for the trip back to Phuket.

It was interesting to see how well Phi Phi has recovered from the tsunami, which was only a year and a half ago--if I hadn't been looking, I probably wouldn't have noticed any signs that it had ever happened. The fact is, the damage to the beachfront businesses was so great that they've all been torn down and replaced by new buildings, with just a few construction sites and piles of uncleared rubble left to remind anyone of the destruction that took place. And it wasn't until later when I saw an old postcard of an aerial view of the island that I realized that the large grassy field between two beaches that we walked across had once been a massive stand of hundreds of palm trees! That made me realize that a lot of things probably look a lot different than they did before.

After returning to Phuket, I had the minivan driver drop me off at Patong Beach, the most popular tourist area of the island. It's a bit like Las Vegas by the Sea--a big circus of neon-lit hotels, bars, restaurants, souvenir shops, discos, massage parlors, Vegas-style shows (including Elvis impersonators!) and even a Thai boxing stadium. I was a little tired for all this craziness, though, so I just found a cheap hotel and crashed.


*I was angry enough about this to send an e-mail to the tour company afterward asking them to make an announcement about not touching the coral before letting people in the water.

PHUKET, THAILAND

I'm staying at the strangely-named On-On Hotel, which is Phuket's oldest hotel, and the first one I could find walking from the bus station.

But it turns out it's also the hotel that was used in the movie The Beach as the run-down Khao San Road flophouse where Leonardo DiCaprio meets the crazy guy who kills himself. I have to say, it looks exactly like it does in the movie. Which is a little creepy, because I keep thinking of the scene where he finds the dead guy and there's blood everywhere--and it looks just like my room.

I don't know why I keep bringing up this movie. It's really awful.

KAWTHAUNG, MYANMAR (BURMA)

I hadn't planned on staying in Thailand for over a month, but after my situation changed, it became necessary for me to renew my 30-day Thai visa. To do this, all you have to do is leave the country and immediately re-enter it, whereupon they issue you a new 30-day visa. It sounds easy, and in theory I guess it is, but making a "visa run" from Koh Phangan involves a rather arduous journey by boat, van, and bus to the Union of Myanmar (formerly Burma) and then back into Thailand.

So basically that's what I've been doing for the past day and a half!

At 10 pm on Sunday I caught the night boat from Koh Phangan to Surat Thani--but unlike the fast boat that brought me to the island in just over two hours, this one takes seven. Ugh. Inside the boat, there are two levels of sleeping areas, with ceilings so low you can't stand up in them, completely lined with mattresses and divided into narrow sleeping spaces. Kind of like a slave ship, come to think of it. But with all the smoking, eating, and talking on cell phones (okay, not so much like a slave ship), not to mention the vibration of the boat's engines, it was really hard for me to get any sleep on the journey.

On arrival (before 5 am), eight of us were herded into a van that took us to the office of the company that arranges the visa runs, where we had some toast and tea, picked up some more folks, then rode three more hours to the town of Ranong. There we got our passports stamped at the immigration office, got back in the van and rode to the pier, then boarded a longtail boat that took us along the river to yet another immigration office on stilts. After showing our passports again, we took the boat out and crossed a very choppy bay, getting more than a little wet along the way, to the southernmost tip of Myanmar and the town of Kawthaung (formerly Victoria Point).

There, at another immigration office on stilts, we surrendered our passports once again and got stamped into Myanmar, then motored to another pier where we got to disembark and walk around the waterfront for about 20 minutes. The whole time we were surrounded by local kids, who tried to get us to buy whiskey, cigarettes, and Viagra (all of which are sold here for really cheap). I decided to pass on all three, and just gave some change to a monk with a collection plate.

After that ever-so-brief taste of Burma, we got back in the longtail boat and headed back to Surat Thani. I had considered returning to Koh Phangan, but then I thought, Phuket.

That's a joke, people.

Anyway, it's pronouced poo-get. (Which I suppose I could make another joke about, but I won't.) But seriously, I did decide to take the bus to Phuket, as I was getting bored with Koh Phangan, and since I've got time to kill, I thought I'd check out some places on the west coast. The bus ride from Surat Thani to Phuket town took four hours, and by the time I found a hotel and checked in, it was 8 pm, making it 24 hours since I started this trip from Haad Rin Beach. Whew.

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Well, today is July 15th, which means it's been exactly six months since I left the U.S. and began this trip. I have to say, sometimes it seems like it hasn't been that long--but at other times it feels like a frickin' eternity! Here at the halfway point, I wish things were a little more certain concerning the future of the trip, but I will say that haven't had any regrets so far.

To celebrate this milestone, I had a couple of beers at the Cactus Bar, along with a celebratory spring roll from a street vendor.

Of course, I wish that Chris were here to celebrate with me, but he's dealing with more important things right now....

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Someone stole my flip-flops yesterday morning.

Perhaps I should have marked this as an ill omen for the Full Moon Party last night. It certainly distracted me a bit at the party, as I spent a good amount of time suspiciously eyeing everyone's feet. But alas, I never found them, or whoever the sick bastard was who pilfered them from the front porch of my bungalow.

As for the party itself, it wasn't bad, but after two weeks of buildup, I guess it was bound to be a little disappointing. It certainly was busy, though--there were literally thousands of people crowding Haad Rin Nok beach by sunset, many of them traveling by longtail boat from other parts of the island and from nearby Koh Samui. By 11 pm there were parts of the beach where it was so packed you couldn't even move!

Unlike most parties of this sort, this one had kind of a schizophrenic feel, as each beachfront bar was blasting a completely different type of music from its sound system. So you'd see people dancing on the sand to drum and bass, then ten feet away it would be house music, then next to that you'd hear techno, then hip-hop, etc. (I tended to hang around in front of Zoom bar, which stuck to hardcore trance.)

I had actually expected more of a rave crowd, but at times it really reminded me of the folks you'd see on a Friday night in Buckhead village. (Scary thought, I know.) Still, there was some cool ravey stuff like fire dancers, dance platforms set up on the beach lit up by black light, flashing police lights on all the water taxis, and a huge sign on the beach that said "AMAZING THAILAND" with figures of elephants and butterflies on it, that they lit on fire at midnight. The kind of stuff that I'm sure would be so much more interesting if you were really drunk or on Ecstasy or 'shrooms or something, which I think everyone else was except me!

I just settled for a couple of Singhas (that's beer, people) and sat on the beach for awhile to look at the moon. That is, until a guy walking behind me tripped and spilled an entire plastic pail full of vodka all over my back--luckily my bungalow was only a minute away from the beach, so I just went back and changed. Of course, this reminded me even more of a typical Friday night in Buckhead, so it wasn't too much later that I decided to call it a night.

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Books I've read in the past week:

The Silmarillion by J. R. R. Tolkien: Yes, Tolkien fan that I am, it's taken me all these years to finally get around to reading this. And truth be told, sometimes it did feel a little like a chore (especially when I was already feverish). Because it's not a simple story like The Lord of the Rings; rather, it's all the background stuff. In fact, it's really like the Bible of Middle Earth, in that it starts with a creation myth, then has pages and pages of who begat whom for hundreds of years, and which cities were laid waste and which lands were rent asunder, and all that fun stuff. But there are some really poetic parts in there, too--the tale of Beren and Luthien, for example. (Did I just say that? Wow, I am a geek.)

A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking: 'Cuz I likes the science, I does. (And in case you needed further proof of my geekdom....) Mostly a very accessible account of what we know about the Big Bang and black holes and such, but I still may have to read this again, because the part about the universe only being explainable using a model that incorporates imaginary time made my head explode.

Life of Pi by Yann Martel: I have to say, this was the best book about being stranded on a lifeboat with a Bengal tiger that I've ever read! Actually, it was a really good read, although there was a point towards the end where I was like, this is getting so unbelievable it's ridiculous. But then the ending totally redeems it, so I was happy again. Check it out; it won the Man Booker prize and everything.

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Things here at Haad Rin are picking up, as more and more people are arriving for the Full Moon Party on Wednesday. All the bungalows are booked up, and the streets are getting crowded with motorbikes and pedestrians. You can tell this is a party crowd, though, because you can walk out to the beach at 11 am, and it's completely deserted! No one wakes up until the afternoon, and the beach bars don't get crowded until well after midnight. Last night I checked out a few of them, which was actually more fun than I thought it would be. One of the bars had fire dancers on the beach, and then the dancers held up a flaming hoop for anyone to jump through that wanted to. I almost tried it myself, but I had too much stuff in my pockets that I thought might fall out. No, really. Anyway, after watching several dozen people try it (and a couple of guys fall on top of the flaming hoop), I realized that drunken fire-jumping is at least as bad an idea as drunken driving.

Thing I hadn't seen until today:

• At breakfast this morning, a woman at the table next to me ordered French toast, and when when it came, she poured a lake of ketchup on her plate and dipped the pieces in it. This same woman actually asked the waiter for coffee--but only if they had instant Nescafe'. You heard me; she actually wanted instant Nescafe'. I so wanted to smack her at that moment.

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

I think being on an island in the sun for too long has started affecting my brain.

For example: There are two restaurants right across the street from one another, about 50 feet from my bungalow, and they both play reruns of Friends on their big-screen TVs. I mean, like 24 hours a day. Seriously. It's a perpetual Friends-a-thon. And if you stand in the middle of the street, it's like stereo Friends-a-thons.

What's worse: Sometimes I go to one of them and order a lemon shake, and watch like eight episodes in a row.

I feel so dirty afterwards.

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Today I got motivated enough to take an afternoon boat trip around the island, along with nine other tourists (five Australians, two Brits, and two Thais) and a crew of two. We took one of the island's famous longtail boats, so named because the outboard motor is basically a car engine on a pole with a ten-foot propellor shaft projecting out behind it (no, I don't know why).

We left from the beach at Haad Rin Nok at noon, and headed around the eastern coast to the north end of the island, which took made me realize how big Koh Phangan really is! Unlike the west side of the island, which is fairly developed with roads, businesses, etc., most of the eastern side of Koh Phangan is just mountains, forest, and beaches, and is only reachable by boat, as there are no roads connecting it yet with the rest of the island.

We motored for a half hour or so past a number of beaches, rocky headlands, and cliffside resorts before reaching our first stop, supposedly the best snorkeling spot on the island, where we all jumped overboard and snorkeled around for twenty minutes or so. The coral here was maybe a little nicer than in the Perhentians (meaning, it didn't look like anyone had been dynamite fishing there lately), but the water was fairly murky, so there wasn't really that much to see; just a few butterfly fish, parrot fish, and sergeant majors. Afterward, we anchored beside the small fishing village of Chaloklum and had lunch on the beach, where a local dog tried to befriend me--or maybe he just wanted my fried rice.

We then headed south to Than Sadet, where we went ashore, then were taken inland by pickup truck to one of the island's waterfalls. Actually, there are several small falls in the river that made for some good swimming and sitting under, which was nice. Our last stop was a really secluded cove with a great beach, where did some more swimming and laying about, before heading back to the beach at Haad Rin. All in all, it was a good break from the crowds of Haad Rin, and a pretty relaxing day.

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Travel Tip #8: There ARE such things as bedbugs, and they DO bite.

After a relatively sleepless and itchy night (see above), and a 5 am transfer to the hammock outside my bungalow, suffice it to say that I am now staying at a different location a little ways down the beach!

Other than that, not much news to report. I finally felt up to going for a swim yesterday, since the beach is only about 50 feet from my bungalow. It's a nice beach, but the water isn't nearly as crystal-clear as it is in the Perhentians, and it's a little more crowded with tourists. Still, I guess I shouldn't complain.

Oh, and at night I finally got to see The DaVinci Code at one of the local restaurants (strangely, the Latin dialogue was subtitled in Russian, but the French dialogue wasn't subtitled at all--luckily, most of it is in English!) I'm always bothered when they change the story from book to screen for no apparent reason, and there were a few changes like that here. Some things worked pretty well, but the critics are right in pointing out that there are more than a few boring and incomprehensible parts as well. The Catholic Church ought to oppose it on THOSE grounds! (They definitely seem to know a thing or two about boring and incomprehensible....)

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Well, I guess the tom kha worked, because surprisingly, I feel a lot better today--and not even a lingering cough or sniffles, which is really odd. I thought this would be one of those colds that drag on and on, but this must have been some weird hit-and-run tropical virus or some'n.

Anyway, now that I'm feeling better, I decided to head to Haad Rin, at the southeast corner of the island, where I'm hoping things will be a little more happenin'. Seethanu was great for sitting around and recovering, but it's also pretty boring, because there's hardly anyone else there. So this morning I caught a taxi to Thong Sala, and then another to Haad Rin, altogether about a half-hour's drive away. After wandering around for awhile, I found a suitable bungalow at the Phangan Bayshore Resort, within sight of the beach, and checked in.

Haad Rin is definitely busier than the sleepy west side of the island; actually, it's kind of like a mini-version of Kuta in Bali: A maze of dusty narrow streets lined with restaurants, internet cafe's, T-shirt shops, and convenience stores (with a sleeping dog lying in front of each one), crowded with sunburned European backpackers. There are actually two beaches here, on either side of the "town": Haad Rin Nok, or "Sunrise Beach," on the east side of the peninsula (this is the Full Moon Party beach), and Haad Rin Nai, "Sunset Beach," on the west. My bungalow is next to Sunrise Beach, which is the longer, nicer beach; similar in size and shape to Long Beach on Perhentian Kecil, but with more beachfront bars, restaurants, and such.

In the evening, most of the restaurants here show (pirated) movies on their big-screen TVs--tonight I caught The Beach, which perhaps not coincidentally is about annoying young backpackers traveling to an island in the Gulf of Thailand. I had only seen the first part of the movie before; having seen the rest I now realize what an utterly godawful flick it is! The one interesting part is when Leonardo DiCaprio and Tilda Swinton have to pick up supplies in Koh Phangan, and keep remarking on how awful it is here, and how this is what happens when an island paradise is ruined and turned utterly commercial by capitalist parasites.

Which, come to think of it, may not be that far from the truth--but unlike in their "paradise," people don't seem to go crazy and kill each other on THIS beach.

Thailand Fun Fact:

• The main reason people come to Haad Rin (and Koh Phangan, for that matter) is for the island's world-famous Full Moon Parties. The first one, back in 1989, consisted of about 50 people dancing on the beach in front of Paradise Bungalows. From there it somehow evolved into a monthly mega-rave where up to 10,000 people show up, and professional DJs from around the world play. The events have been so successful that in addition to the monthly Full Moon Party, there's now also a "Black Moon Party," "Half Moon Party," and even a "Shiva Moon Party," whatever that is. (So basically, every week there's something going on, in case you arrive too early or late for the full moon.)

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

I suppose there's something a little romantic about languishing in a hammock in a tropical island bungalow, delirious with fever, but in reality that gets old pretty quick! I'm hoping that the restorative powers ascribed to chicken soup extend to chicken tom kha, which is about as close as I could find at the little restaurant down the road.

People met today:

• Matt from Melbourne, Australia, who was supposed to be touring SE Asia with a friend, but somehow ended up in Koh Phangan on his own (where have I heard that story before?). Despite cutting his foot on coral and crashing his motorbike twice, he loves it here and keeps extending his stay, at the expense of seeing Laos and Cambodia.

KOH PHANGAN, THAILAND

Whew. Eighteen hours after boarding a double-decker tour bus in Bangkok with 50 other scraggly Khao San Road backpackers, I finally dragged myself into my bungalow on the island of Koh Phangan, off Thailand's east coast, at noon today. The epic all-night bus ride would have been bad enough, but combined with my nasty head cold and a throbbing headache, it just plain sucked. Not to mention the fact that they'd overbooked the bus, which meant more delays and lots of angry people. It actually took us about two hours just to get out of the city, and then en route we stopped two more times on the side of the road, in the rain, for for no apparent reason! Oh, and someone vomited on the bus steps. Worst of all, we were forced to watch the movie Stealth. All I could think was, This must be what Guantanamo is like.

And that was just the first part of the journey--then I had to get off the bus in Surat Thani, take another bus to the coast, and then ride a freezing-cold ferry over choppy seas, first to the big resort island of Koh Samui, then north to Koh Phangan, where two Swedish guys and I caught a taxi north to "The Beach" at Sritanu, where we'd booked bungalows.

Unfortunately, despite its name, this place isn't nearly as scenic as the Leonardo DiCaprio movie. The bungalows aren't bad, but the beach here is alternately rocky and muddy, and too shallow for proper swimming, unless you wade a long way out. But frankly, I didn't care, as I was too exhausted to think about swimming. Actually, all I wanted to do was crash, but the Swedish guys wanted to get something to eat, and as our resort is kind of in the middle of nowhere, we decided to take a taxi back into the "town" of Thong Sala (where the boats come in) and find a restaurant. This we did, at which point they decided to rent a motorbike to go exploring, and I took a taxi back to the bungalow and slept.

People met today:

• Sammy and ??? (darn it, forgot his name), from Sweden. Nice guys. Sammy just got his master's degree in International Business or Finance or something a week ago. They're on a three-week holiday in Thailand, and came to Koh Phangan for the Full Moon Party.

BANGKOK, THAILAND

In a few hours I leave on the overnight bus to Surat Thani, where tomorrow morning I'll catch the ferry to the island of Koh Phangan. After a couple of weeks in Bangkok, I'm definitely ready to get out of the city and see a little more of Thailand, even if it's just some more touristy islands and beaches.

I haven't done much else in the last few days, possibly because I've come down with a cold and have been doing a lot of sleeping. But yesterday I ventured out to the mall and saw Superman Returns at the multiplex, which was okay, if not spectacular. Actually, it reminded me a lot of the 1978 Superman movie--I don't know if that's a good thing or not! Kevin Spacey makes a good Lex Luthor, at any rate.